Today i was mad. She was sick. And my mum and her siblings left her alone. I was grumpy at home
He asks are you sad for me or for you?
In munnar saro gave a mighty sneeze while going down a hill and she says appa is going to sneeze us all the way down
My sweetheart
Everyday i thank God for you
22nd dec is easily the happiest day in my life. For you came into my world this day. after years of prayer you arrived as god's most precious gift
Amd created in me waves of feelings i have never experienced before
To love another being like this i have never felt
I thought i knew love. Then you came. And then i knew love that can never be described. So ... full so unbreakable yet so fragile
You taught me how much love my parents had for me.
When i first knew you wwre inside me i could hardly contain myself for excitement. I had a seed of life actually growing inside me. Then you were out. Next to me on my cot as they wheeled me to my ward. You were real and yet unreal. Perfect. Complete. And next to me. Akshaya. My life . My love.
And now you are nine. Nine. You have taught me so much these 9 years. My own culture heritage. The Ramayana. You brought me closer to these. Opening up whole new vistas for me.
Your care. Your sense of responsibility. These never cease to amaze me. You reach out to care for me your appa your siblings with such a genuine touch. I love you darling. For who you are. And.. only now are you 'my daughter'. You are a beautiful perfect soul entrusted to me as a gift from God. I only pray everyday i do my best to guide you as i am meant to so you become the person you are meant to become. I don't own you. I am just blessed to have a small part to play in your life.. and that is by the grace of God. Thank you darling for coming into my life and being all that you are, for bringing me closer to god and giving me a chance to know you, hold you, love you. May god bless you abundantly always.
Highlights for kids
1. Cows and goats and dogs and pigs and donkeys on streets
2. Elephant blessings in Kunakudi then Meenakshi Amman temple
3. Monkeys all around in Azhagar Kovil -having breakfast in a giant "cage" watched in close proximity by a monkey at Pazhamudhir Cholai, monkeys acconpanying us in the forst enroute to the natural spring at top of hill
4. Elephant ride at temple with huge vishnu
5. Climbing the mountain in Saravana Poigai
6. Feeding goats by hand at Pillayarpetti
7. Cute (a bit mad?) Cow at the beach at Thiruchandur... first called the cuckoo maadu until Ashwin got mad on its behalf and threatened to hit us if we call it cuckoo again! It jumped around at beach and scared them
8. Playful puppy drinking milk from mummy dog near temple at Thiruchandoor. Another puppy konjing its mother.
9. Horse rides in Marina Beach
10. Elephant rise at munnar
11. Super cottage at munnar
12. Scary ride down and up hill at night at munnar
He had diarrhoea on our way back from india and saro was looking after him cleaning him up and so on. At 5 am he tells his father.. "its not easy being a parent right?" Saro is shocked! And he starts tearing up. "Its not nice to see other people's bums but if you are parent you have to".
We just have to hug this gem. To empathise with us when he's sick and miserable... just amazing. God's precious gifts.
On our trip up to munnar- treacherous curves late night narrow roads... i was praying practically non stop. And this little fellow pipes in to the sister "i dont mind if i die. Im happy to see god!". Such purity of faith here. Thats the spirit we all should have when its time to meet the maker! I love him so much!!
And then he asks me if i love cakes more or him more!!! He checks my face worriedly to see if i mean it when i say cakes and he cuddles up and says "no you are lying aatha i know because you are smiling!"
And then he asks... you love god more than you love your children right aatha?
Now thats a tough one. My instinct is to say ... to love you is yo love god. There is no difference. You are god's gifts i love you as i love Him.
But... haha this is a moment of reckoning for me maybe. When i was a kid i prayed and i remember telling god i will always love him first followed by my parents and my brother. Indeed ive often wondered about that when i think about the love for saro and kids. Mentally i would do a shuffling. God first then family. I still don't have am answer to my son's questions...
Heres where we went:
Day 1: arrive at chennai. Headed to tailors. Kids headed to rooftop with devi athai
Day 2: see iyya with my parents. Kids sing most of Sasthi Kavasam to Iyya making him smile.
Then to aaya's home to see aaya annamalai arun nandhan somu and payya iyya and padma aaya!
Motorcycle rides with the uncles.
Beach fun. Waves getting soaked. Horse rides. Carousel rides. Shooting balloons.
Day 3: chill at home. night train to sivagangai. Ashwin sleeps alone in train on a berth. Kids like three cute monkeys on the third deck together
Day 4: alavakotai. Kids help clean up place. Excited about the old house.
Then to kunakudi . Got blessings from elephant. Aishu gpt upset we left her akone in the car coz sje was slerping. Then pillayar petti. Gorgeous karpaga vinayagar. Kids fed goats.
Then home to lunch
Then to kaliamman temple and kannathal temple. Golden chariot.
