Ah - yesterday, I realized, how difficult it's going to be to let my daughter go
I had planned a fun simple shopping trip for saro baby and me
to my consternation, my daughter didn't want to come with us!
She wanted to stay home with auntie and cook while her mum and dad went shopping!
I could not believe it.
we asked her several times and she was sure she wanted to stay behind
so we went without her - heavy of heart mind you! I hadn't expected this so soon!
turns out 10 min after we left she started crying for us! GRRRRR
how can I make a 2 year old responsible for her choices! so next time, if I decide or plan something, I;m going to go through with it, because, you know what, sometimes it's true that mummy knows best!
that said, it was a good jolt for me, to realize how difficult I was finding it to let my darling go. I almost don't want her to grow up! that's terrible isn't it? when does that magic moment come when they want to do their own thing that doesn't involve us, and we actually give them our blessings?!?!?!?!?!
no wonder my dad asked me when I was 13 why I wanted to grow up so fast all because I wanted to go to my friend's place to play badminton!
how did they find it in them to let me go for overseas trips?
I can imagine my dad worrying about me the three weeks I was away in Nepal - not wanting to stand in my way but worrying anyway
I can imagine my mum crying when she realized I was a little lost in Malaysia by myself at the ripe age of 21!
Parents never cease to worry do they! I pride myself on being all so cool, but I can't either. parenthood opens doors to the self as much as to the world - I can only pray :-) for guidance to lead and guide and not stand in the way, to leap in and defend when necessary and to stand up for what I believe is right, and hope that it is right -just always always pray before anything - a few minutes of silence to hear the voice and direction of God will help us tremendously - if I had paused to listen yesterday, I would have taken her with me, but leaving her behind, although it made us both miserable, has given me this much food for thought! so as always, no regrets in life. just onwards, forward, wtih love!
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Monday, January 17, 2011
Baby Kicking!
I should re-name this blog Babies and Us - Yes - we are expecting our second child!
I am writing about it today because today is very significant - it's the first day I felt my baby move!
My first one moved (or rather kicked) during a piano concert on Aug 5 2008. At least, that's when I felt it. Now with the second, I am more attuned to the feeling of the baby inside - and .... this is wonderful! feeling baby move was one of the most special things about being pregnant the first time round and I am so happy to have started feeling it already now - I'm 3 months preggy! okay, 3 going on 4 about 3 1/2
still! 1 1/2 months more of enjoyment time!
17 Jan and 5 Aug - I shall remember these dates!
I am writing about it today because today is very significant - it's the first day I felt my baby move!
My first one moved (or rather kicked) during a piano concert on Aug 5 2008. At least, that's when I felt it. Now with the second, I am more attuned to the feeling of the baby inside - and .... this is wonderful! feeling baby move was one of the most special things about being pregnant the first time round and I am so happy to have started feeling it already now - I'm 3 months preggy! okay, 3 going on 4 about 3 1/2
still! 1 1/2 months more of enjoyment time!
17 Jan and 5 Aug - I shall remember these dates!
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Play-School Blues
Ah, the day was long awaited, with great excitement - first day at school!
Play school!
but... sigh, reality is rather different.
2 hours of class, of which 1 1/2 hours are really classroom management
only main pick up points are the art and song segment which each last no longer than 10 minutes each
Free play goes on for 1/2 hour, but small children get bored in 10 min
so.. all in all, not that good an experience I would say!
within an hour, I hear my doll say, let's go home!
plus, no chance of socializing skills as yet as she insists we stay in the class with her and she wails her heart out if we leave
since the day she was born we've not been into forcing her into things - we did baby led weaning and baby led sleeping etc - the forcefully leaving her to cry for two weeks just gave us all unnecessary heart pain
and I guess so would this - if I were to say I don't care you stay in the class and learn to be by yourself no matter what - nope not in my parenting style
I'm going for the open consultative approach - where I tell her the truth and she comes to believe me - so what I'm telling her is that she has to go to school on her own, that she will soon be ready and that we will leave her on own the day she says she's ready
not sure if this is the best
but then again 2 years old is incredibly young you know
to be left all alone for two hours.
and for what? the two hours is not a fantastic use of time for her! she's getting half hour worth of good from the two hours a day and I do not advocate time wasting ever
she can learn so much more and faster with us at home and through various enrichment classes I can take her for, like music, gym and art
so - nope I believe I'm taking her out of school in 3 weeks time - just waiting for a month to go, was actually considering taking her out of school now itself but the hubby feels give it a month so let's see.
Play school!
but... sigh, reality is rather different.
2 hours of class, of which 1 1/2 hours are really classroom management
only main pick up points are the art and song segment which each last no longer than 10 minutes each
Free play goes on for 1/2 hour, but small children get bored in 10 min
so.. all in all, not that good an experience I would say!
within an hour, I hear my doll say, let's go home!
plus, no chance of socializing skills as yet as she insists we stay in the class with her and she wails her heart out if we leave
since the day she was born we've not been into forcing her into things - we did baby led weaning and baby led sleeping etc - the forcefully leaving her to cry for two weeks just gave us all unnecessary heart pain
and I guess so would this - if I were to say I don't care you stay in the class and learn to be by yourself no matter what - nope not in my parenting style
I'm going for the open consultative approach - where I tell her the truth and she comes to believe me - so what I'm telling her is that she has to go to school on her own, that she will soon be ready and that we will leave her on own the day she says she's ready
not sure if this is the best
but then again 2 years old is incredibly young you know
to be left all alone for two hours.
and for what? the two hours is not a fantastic use of time for her! she's getting half hour worth of good from the two hours a day and I do not advocate time wasting ever
she can learn so much more and faster with us at home and through various enrichment classes I can take her for, like music, gym and art
so - nope I believe I'm taking her out of school in 3 weeks time - just waiting for a month to go, was actually considering taking her out of school now itself but the hubby feels give it a month so let's see.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
I cooked breakfast!
that was all my kutty was saying yesterday. she was so thrilled with one of her birthday presents - from sita, naga and prince - a kitchen set. she pretended to boil vegetables and noodles on it and served it with great pride onto a pink bowl and set it up in the hall, for her father to eat! all she could say was, Appa I made breakfast appa, I cooked it!
In the afternoon, she was careful to hide the fish as my mum was vegetarian and at night she told me to be careful as the pot was hot on the stove!
delightful to see her so engaged with her toys! I must get her to make more kinds of food using playdough maybe, and cook them too in her new cooking set. one should see her pouring in the oil, the pepper, the salt - with such practised expertise I tell you! A joy to watch.
In the afternoon, she was careful to hide the fish as my mum was vegetarian and at night she told me to be careful as the pot was hot on the stove!
delightful to see her so engaged with her toys! I must get her to make more kinds of food using playdough maybe, and cook them too in her new cooking set. one should see her pouring in the oil, the pepper, the salt - with such practised expertise I tell you! A joy to watch.
2nd day at school
bawl bawl bawl!
I wasn't there - but I had such a low feeling all morning - I so wanted to be there, I was thinking, I should be the one taking her to school and bringing her back! not my mum - but there I was going to work. and my baby told me yesterday, don't go to oppice aatha, stay with achiya. I had to ignore that plea and drag myself to work and here I am, and there she is, and she cried so much today my mum had to sit in with her in the class for 1 and 1/2 hours!!!
nethu kannu vachutaen!
will see how it goes - if she dreads it this much in two weeks time, well, we'll pull her out I guess. maybe she's not school ready - but it seems most of the class was crying today so maybe she's just normal. :-)
I wasn't there - but I had such a low feeling all morning - I so wanted to be there, I was thinking, I should be the one taking her to school and bringing her back! not my mum - but there I was going to work. and my baby told me yesterday, don't go to oppice aatha, stay with achiya. I had to ignore that plea and drag myself to work and here I am, and there she is, and she cried so much today my mum had to sit in with her in the class for 1 and 1/2 hours!!!
nethu kannu vachutaen!
will see how it goes - if she dreads it this much in two weeks time, well, we'll pull her out I guess. maybe she's not school ready - but it seems most of the class was crying today so maybe she's just normal. :-)
First Day at School
My little darling, barely 2 years and 2 weeks old, went to school yesterday!
It was play school and she was truly an angel. She slipped in past other children in the queue, got her temperature taken, her hands and feet and mouth checked and ran off to the class. She called out to us a few times, but then stayed on wide eyed, participating in the activities. She clapped her hands, stood up, tried to climb on some chairs, did some colouring and paid attention when the teacher read to her. other children took turns to cry for their mums, but not my darling. Then, it was five minutes more to the end of class. The teacher had helped the kids put on their shoes... and she saw me peeping at her through the glass window! her lower lips quivered.. her eyes pooled, one minute later she was wailing harder than any of the other children!!!!!! my poor darling - it must have suddenly struck her that she was all alone in that big class without her mum and her grandmother. I berate myself for showing my face to her.
It was play school and she was truly an angel. She slipped in past other children in the queue, got her temperature taken, her hands and feet and mouth checked and ran off to the class. She called out to us a few times, but then stayed on wide eyed, participating in the activities. She clapped her hands, stood up, tried to climb on some chairs, did some colouring and paid attention when the teacher read to her. other children took turns to cry for their mums, but not my darling. Then, it was five minutes more to the end of class. The teacher had helped the kids put on their shoes... and she saw me peeping at her through the glass window! her lower lips quivered.. her eyes pooled, one minute later she was wailing harder than any of the other children!!!!!! my poor darling - it must have suddenly struck her that she was all alone in that big class without her mum and her grandmother. I berate myself for showing my face to her.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)