yesterday I yelled ar ashwin for a good 15 min
he stood while I yelled
when I went to comfort him after that he literally backed away into a corner, making himself as small as he could, hiding behind a pillow. he was cowering like he feared physical blows.
that's how much my words hurt him.
sometimes I truly suck at parenting.
there was an immediate change in him once I told him I knew he had been working hard this week. the minute he felt heard his sobbing eased. like a switch.
I eased him onto my lap kissed his cheeks and told him I had been wrong to suggest he had done nothing at all this week or these past two days. and I worked out what was really bothering me about him.
we discussed the concept of the glass being half full vs half empty and how to practise seeing certain facts.
and he cried again when he shared how he tried to hide his anger and I still got mad at him. I told him he and I, we can't hide our feelings. the only way not to look angry is to not be angry and for that we have to practise using our the half full glass perspectives.
i was feeling umhappy about other things too. I need to figure out my feelings about those as well. in another post.
