psle results

akshaya got 262 for her psle with 3 A stars and one A

I got 232 with one A star and 3 As

next year on the kids won't have this number tagged to them. you cannot tell how relieved I am. 

First the good stuff. am so proud of akshaya. she worked hard. and she and her friends all did equally well. 263 for shruthi. 266 for hasini. 263 for thilaga

akshaya has come out among the top students in her school, top 10 percent definitely..as I did from cedar ha, but not psle.

she worked hard and consistently. we did not cut off books for her. she set her own targets and revised them. lots of pep talks from us. wonderful support of her teachers. Mrs Ravi cried in happiness for akshaya . I'm so moved by that teacher whom akshaya only got to know for a year. she helped coach her for her dsa too. 

akshaya and thilaga seem to be among the very few who got thru dsa too. 

I'm very blessed. 

i worry a bit too. akshaya needs to face challenges. her health is a challenge already of course  one we cannot lightly forget about. academically too. I'm not saying I wish she had not got dsa not got her results and all. of course she deserved to get it. it didn't just come from nowhere but with hours of practice dedication and sacrifice. so that's a good lesson for her. she didn't do well in her dance exam coz she didn't practice. that was good for her. she didn't do as well in math because her midset was not right. that was good for her. so a lot of things have to be in the right balance for her to do well and she had some small setbacks to help spur her on. 

she went for math and science tuition. English and tamil regular coaching from us. so all her subject bands were covered. science was almost on a request basis as the same tutor was her math tutor. she had her teachers rooting for her, her tutors rooting for her too. such a blessed child. God's own child. 

she succeeded out of hard work and solid support.  

the kids who don't have this level of support, it is harder for them. fact of life. 

now, some awkward feelings. 

that with her score saro and I can hold our heads up high. it shouldn't be that way? but kids do make parents proud. and we are not only proud of academic achievement.  also other areas. but this system. that places a score on 12 year old and parents feel proud or downcast coz of that score... that sucks. a father whose son got 243 was saying it in a downcast manner. 

I would have been so sad if my dad had to tell people I got 232 in a sad manner.. it would have killed me what are we doing to our kids. shouldn't we be saying he got 243! he got 232! he finished this gruelling journey doing the best he could! 

then I think people might think easy for me to say ' my kid got 262. I don't know. id like to think I would have said that no matter what she got. 

one day the test will come I suppose. I don't need the kids to do badly to test if my theories about how I might behave are true! but in my heart I believe 

1. the journey is more important than the destination 

2. values matter more than grades 

well thanks for hearing me ramble on! 

education and the state

 Today I learnt with a sense of dejavu and horror that our education system is a state machination. 

I've always known it but never been confronted with it the way I was today 

I was told that sustainability is going to be an issue we need to pay attention to - my ears perked up - that's great - that's relevant - we can all afford to think about sustainability 

Then comes the caveat - be aware of NEA guidelines and definitions of sustainability and do not promote books or ideas that go against NEA's guidelines. Some of Singapore's practices would not be considered sustainable by international standards

decisions motivations

Aishwarya shared with me her decision making process. a few sec within which to debate before acting. 

she had spilled some soup while running with it to put it back at a tray return point.

teacher asked who did it

she thought

1. if I don't admit, one of my friends may get into trouble instead of me

2. if i don't admit, I will not be deserving of the adjective my teacher attached to my name-honest Aishwarya 

3. I want to tell the truth but I'm a bit scared. 

4. my teacher may scold  worse if she find out I lied. remember terence! 

5. she may not scold me at all if I tell the truth 

all in  split second and she made up her mind and she walked up and told her, amidst the clamour of children vehemently denying that they had done it. ..

the reward. teacher asked her to clean it up.  no scolding. a warm feeling of having done the right thing despite the temptation and choice available to not own up. 

New decisions

I should update you 

that my son has decided to give up his idea of staying single. 

he made the decision one night after making his younger sister sleep. he must have been 7. 

apparently it wore him out and he decided to stay single. his dislike of romance and the terms boyfriend an girlfriend kind of sealed the deal for him.  

last night he suddenly asked, is it bad to be single and I said no. I wasn't connecting this to his conversation  2 years ago see. 

he persisted. wont it he boring, there wouldn't be anyone to play with 

I said singles can play with their friends. (ah the idealism of youth... that even as we grow up, wanting to play is the key thing on our minds- it should be !) 

but they would have to check if they were free and all. yes I nodded. 

then I asked , are you rethinking your idea of staying single. he nodded seriously. it couldn't be because if a girl i knew, (he's 9!). what happened i asked him.. what if I get scared and all... ? 

I have sherlock Holmes and the story the speckled band to thank for this change of heart. he got sonscared reading it, he is now open to getting married!