aishu turns 9

from having no plans to suddenly being plan filled my baby 's birthday turned out orety nice

haul of presents. 

markers drawing journalz 4 story books cards tee shirt toys Waterville, watch

gorgeous experimental birthday cake

midnight shopping for a bike

pastamania llunch

surprise party after school. 

and in 3 weeks time a water party with her friends. fingers crossed that goes well too..

 

parenting lessons

today I learnt an expensive lesson in parenting

I paid 350 dollars for an enrichment class for my daughter in dance. a 2 week dance convention.  

I had done so.based on my experience of watching it over the years and admiring it and knowing such exposure is good for aspiring dancers 

but she was not keen

and I signed her up anyway

and she was so grumpy about it

and fell ill on that day

almost willfully I would believe haha

and we made a deal she just needs to attend 1 day of the 4 to give it a chance 

and she did and predictably said she doesn't want to attend more 

and now I am short of 350 and my daughters respect and I may have turned her away from such classes in the future too

sigh. 

for her I drove her there and went back again to give her drink for her throat and back again to pick her up . she said no thanks. 

what do I do. I signed her up so it's my fate to send her and pick her up and be at her beck and call

or teach her manners and not to take things for granted and to say please and thank you even if its for classes she dislikes 

I give up and shall say nothing. I need to go for  a walk or something. I don't like her very much now and she doesn't like me much

from her perspective 

my mum signs me up for something without asking me 

she doesn't care that I'm sick still sending me for it 

guilt trips me saying it cost her 350 bucks.

yup. that's how I look to her now. 

sigh. 

I had a delicious cup of coffee today. and played with my bird in between my chauffeuring duties. 

am gonna get my bike and head down to coney Island. 

aishu the wordsmith

I'm getting less flexible aatha or is it morningness? 

I better not exercise with my dance dress it will get unironed 

my babies hair

her hair was quite long. beautiful too. she wanted to cut it. so now it lies on floor. lovely tresses. I wonder if we should have given it for hair for hope instead. it would make a beautiful wig. soft and silky. 

literature

akshaya works so hard

appreciated the poem

but still scored so little

feel.bad for her 

must experience success 

moods

I'm.back to feeling like I'll never be happy again 

she has a flare. it's been 2 weeks. Still there is blood, pain. 

I just need to give the flare time to subside I guess 

confidence

okay akshaya is having a hard time 

however we need to help her look beyond her health conditions and not feel sorry for herself

she needs to stop feeling a victim and take control of her life again

How you can celebrate small successes darling! 

you: 

- ate late night dinner with no issues

- ate panneer with no issue- both signs if improving health because of all your perseverance and self discipline in taking your medicines 

- were able to focus in a new math tuition class  despite feeling nervous, and apply learning, showing dedication and willingness to learn and grow 

- spoke to new kids at bhajan, willing to step out of shell when nec, showing courage 

- led games at kavins party, willing to set aside personal pains and worries for sake of loved ones

- demonstrated self control at the parties, with regard to food, showing great maturity and trust,

- finding new recipes that make life interesting again showing willingness to try new things and being open

- consistently taking the modulant even if not enjoyable, showing determination to get well and perseverance and sense of duty

- found pockets of time in school to do homework even before coming home- showing dedication, motivation and resourcefulness. 

- survived a full day of lessons despite headaches and other aches and pains. You are a champion already darling 

Now we just have to keep going step by step. 

I love you

 

everyday stop a minute and tell yourself all that you have done well.  you do so many things you don't even realise! 

akshaya in school

Nice teachers for Math, Lit, Tamil

Strict teacher for history 

Boring teacher for 

parenting ashwin

man today I yelled at ashwin just before he went to school. sigh he was just himself i guess but I noticed like 10 things he could have done better all at once and I lost it. I opened his school bag to put covers for his exercise books and I found a math worksheet just stuffed in BESIDE the file. The last 5 years and in particular last year we have spent hours, HOURS looking for stray pieces of homework.  and first week of school he stuffs the paper like that! yesterday also he cried that he must have left it at school and I found it at the bottom of the file crumpled. yesterday to today, same piece of paper, he doesn't think to take care of it! and this is not new we have discussed putting his hw in his file a gazillion times. ok so first thing to set me off, his paper outside his file. then I take his exercise books. all no name no subject  no cover nothing. so asked him to sit down and tell me while I write for him as he was having breakfast. the pen doesn't work so I take his pencil case out and what do I find inside... broken pens, springs plastic bits, unsharpened pencils no eraser ... i dump out all his broken stuff . I had asked him to pack his pencil case before school started on wed and on Fri its like this means this is what he thinks is a well packed pencil case! grrr. then we write names. earlier he said he can't find his notebooks when they were clearly in his cupboard. wrote tamil spelling in a book that later turned out to be his English journal he had started in class but did not write the name outside.  oh my god. so all this done his cubes. precious cubes. he throws them in the bag too and when you open the zip they just tumble out. these are cubes he does actually care about but not enough to put them in little felt bags that the cubes came with!!! I cannot take it. he cries when the cubes  break. but even when i offer him his felt bag he refuses it!!!! what do I with this guy!!! 

then he goes to his room and growls and groans, scaring everyone. I go to see what's going in he says he is angry he got scolded for 30 min. that's what he is angry about. whining about getting scolded not focused on what he has learnt

 he should be celebrating. voila today he learnt a packed pencil case should have working pens and pencils and not broken bits. he learned his cubes need a felt bag to be safe. he learnt notebooks need names and subject titles on them. should be happy right at last he learnt these things. grrrrrrrrr

parenting ashwin

man today I yelled at ashwin just before he went to school. sigh he was just himself i guess but I noticed like 10 things he could have done better all at once and I lost it. I opened his school bag to put covers for his exercise books and I found a math worksheet just stuffed in BESIDE the file. The last 5 years and in particular last year we have spent hours, HOURS looking for stray pieces of homework.  and first week of school he stuffs the paper like that! yesterday also he cried that he must have left it at school and I found it at the bottom of the file crumpled. yesterday to today, same piece of paper, he doesn't think to take care of it! and this is not new we have discussed putting his hw in his file a gazillion times. ok so first thing to set me off, his paper outside his file. then I take his exercise books. all no name no subject  no cover nothing. so asked him to sit down and tell me while I write for him as he was having breakfast. the pen doesn't work so I take his pencil case out and what do I find inside... broken pens, springs plastic bits, unsharpened pencils no eraser ... i dump out all his broken stuff . I had asked him to pack his pencil case before school started on wed and on Fri its like this means this is what he thinks is a well packed pencil case! grrr. then we write names. earlier he said he can't find his notebooks when they were clearly in his cupboard. wrote tamil spelling in a book that later turned out to be his English journal he had started in class but did not write the name outside.  oh my god. so all this done his cubes. precious cubes. he throws them in the bag too and when you open the zip they just tumble out. these are cubes he does actually care about but not enough to put them in little felt bags that the cubes came with!!! I cannot take it. he cries when the cubes  break. but even when i offer him his felt bag he refuses it!!!! what do I with this guy!!! 

then he goes to his room and growls and groans, scaring everyone. I go to see what's going in he says he is angry he got scolded for 30 min. that's what he is angry about. whining about getting scolded not focused on what he has learnt

 he should be celebrating. voila today he learnt a packed pencil case should have working pens and pencils and not broken bits. he learned his cubes need a felt bag to be safe. he learnt notebooks need names and subject titles on them. should be happy right at last he learnt these things. grrrrrrrrr