captive to my teen

I must first erase my ego

and let the 15 year old control me completely 

I am gonna try it

She's threatening me

by cutting herself,

her body buckling in pain 

acting up every which way 

nerves joints dizziness chest pains,

you name it her body presents it.

She is threatening me,

her body is threatening me

and I don't want her or her body to suffer.

I must give in.

It's blackmail but

I don't see a way out 

so when she says 

I want to drop a subjext 

I'll be saying OK

no questions asked 

when she says

I don't want to go to school.

I'll say OK.

Starting today - 

cos I saw the marks on her wrist 

and I am scared.

I'd rather have a lazy bum escapist daughter 

than no daughter 

thank you very much 

and besides

she is very bright 

when she decides to get to something 

she will

so I shouldn't stand in the way 

trying to act all responsible mother like

just give her what she wants

each and every time 

no school? OK

new clothes? OK

trip to Europe? OK

Ok Ok Ok

you just be ok

She said the other day 

she finds it hard to believe 

there are people who have no pain any time of the day

not even a cold

coz she's been in constant pain

for days weeks months years? 

so you know what 

heck it

she wants a new bag-Ok

no school -Ok

just get ok